Been experimenting a bit with meditation. I try to, give or take, do 2 hours of meds a day. I find it is definately easier and seems to be more beneficial for me if I do those 2 hours in divided sessions, rather than doing the 2 hours all in one sitting.
I have also been feeling unwell, been getting a lot of physical aches and pains that I need to take medicine for to get some relief. I suffer from a chronic neurological illness that makes me have mobility problems as well as extreme tiredness at times.
One thing I have learned is that being awakened/enlightened doesn’t change things like sickness and death. Even the Buddha himself got sick and died. I have learnt to accept my physical limitations, being awakened doesn’t change those.
One of the four noble truths is impermanence. Nobody gets to escape shedding their mortal coil, that is not what being awakened/enlightened is all about. I’m sure there are such things as miracles, we’ve all witnessed things that we call miracles, but being awakened isn’t about performing miracles. It isn’t about developing super powers or psychic tricks. Don’t get me wrong such things can happen, but they aren’t the reason for meditating, and they aren’t the goal – if you aren’t careful you can get attached to mystical stuff and the illusory self will identify with it and then you are right back where you started.
Being awakened just means seeing reality for what it is, understanding mind and the true nature of things. You still keep whatever physical form you have with all it’s limitations, you still have the same brain and the odd quirks and traits that go with it. The only thing that’s really changed is you know yourself and can see things as they really are, and this creates a feeling of being completely at peace with yourself and everything around you.
Christians can replace the word Buddha, with the word Christ. Us Westerners have grown up with the teachings of Jesus and that’s fine.
Be wary of religion though, be careful it doesn’t become a cage for your mind. I think many religions have lost the point of the original teachings, and instead of freeing people from their ego, they add more fuel to it, the ego or maya self is a tricky bugger. It doesn’t care what it identifies with. It will quite happily identify with being a hopeless sinner, a devotee, priest, mystic or great teacher; as it will identify with a job title, career, leader, patriot, race, class, consumer, victim or anything else it can conjure up and trick you into associating with. None of these things are who you are.
Religion can become a trap. It teaches people to depend on something or someone outside themselves – and that isn’t freedom.
One thing that my thinking loops get fixated on is this idea you have to be worthy to feel peace, that you have to achieve it by reaching some goal, or going on a journey.
It is not true. It’s already there within us. To feel it we have to let go, stop thinking so much and getting caught up in our loops and spirals. You don’t have to jump through any hoops; or achieve anything in this life to find peace.
Just let go man, be and feel the peace that comes from being in the presence of your true self and not the illusory one created by thinking too much.
When the French politicians announced today they plan to keep armed police on the streets, to give them the power to enter anyone’s house and search it without a warrant, the power to place anyone they want to under house arrest and impose curfews on them without the need to seek judicial authority. The power to take down any website they feel the need to, at any time. It confirmed in me what I have been seeing this all lead to.
They want every country to be like this. They want us all to be manipulated and programmed into accepting this. That’s why they are insisting the French national anthem be sung at every premier league football match, to programme the people to prepare for a coming police state they’ve been planning and gradually introducing for a long time now. The French ministers say it will be for three months, however many people are concerned once implemented it will never end, people are concerned France will become a permanent police state. If it is seen as successful in France it will be implemented here too. They will manipulate us with their stories of fear, to sheepishly hand over our freedom to them.
The darkness will cloud everything. All minds and hearts will be tested. Fear will affect us all & test our inner strength & resolve.
For example if it becomes illegal to give food or money to a homeless person, what do you do? Do you break the law even if it is in front of armed police, or if there is a risk you will be found out by the mass surveillance. Do you show compassion to that human being or do you close your heart out of fear of punishment from the state?
These are the sorts of dilemmas people will be faced with in the coming age. Do you protect a friend? And in so doing risk punishment yourself for doing so. Do you stop listening to your heart, shut your mind to the voice of your conscience and do the evil the state asks of you in order to survive?
Will you speak out against evil or will you stay silent out of fear?
Things are getting really dark. When TTIP is pushed through, corporations will descend on our nations like vultures on a corpse and exploit them for all they are worth. Corporations will come first and ISDS will pull the strings of our governments. They are in truth already pulling the strings of our governments; TTIP will rubber stamp it and make it official, make it law.
Our environment and our homes will no longer be protected, we will lose our human rights. They will rape the earth without mercy, and the beast of capitalism will rise unfettered. Greed will have no end, no bounds, there will be no lengths it won’t go to in it’s depravity. There may come a time when people will no longer have the right to grow their own food or collect rainwater.
I believe people must not let the darkness consume them, they must not surrender to it and ally themselves with it. It may take great courage for many to stand up to this beast; but if your heart tells you to show compassion, even if that compassion is against the laws of man, do it. Follow your heart, show kindness, believe in the light even in it’s absence. This madness won’t last, there is always hope, and the light will come again, it will come from all those who stay true to it and this darkness will wither away and die and there will be new growth.
Seem to be going through a lot of soul searching at the moment. In the wilderness of my mind and life, seeing things from different angles, not really settling, feeling the light and shadows within me dancing. My head and heart is breaking and coming back together again, I write about everything and I write about nothing. I am neither here or there, I don’t know where I am, in some inbetween place where everything I thought I knew is challenged and spat on and laughed at and spun around like something without roots, at the mercy of invisible forces I twist and turn, but cannot see where I am going or where I will stop.