Been experimenting a bit with meditation. I try to, give or take, do 2 hours of meds a day. I find it is definately easier and seems to be more beneficial for me if I do those 2 hours in divided sessions, rather than doing the 2 hours all in one sitting.

I have also been feeling unwell, been getting a lot of physical aches and pains that I need to take medicine for to get some relief. I suffer from a chronic neurological illness that makes me have mobility problems as well as extreme tiredness at times.

One thing I have learned is that being awakened/enlightened doesn’t change things like sickness and death. Even the Buddha himself got sick and died. I have learnt to accept my physical limitations, being awakened doesn’t change those.

One of the four noble truths is impermanence. Nobody gets to escape shedding their mortal coil, that is not what being awakened/enlightened is all about. I’m sure there are such things as miracles, we’ve all witnessed things that we call miracles, but being awakened isn’t about performing miracles. It isn’t about developing super powers or psychic tricks. Don’t get me wrong such things can happen, but they aren’t the reason for meditating, and they aren’t the goal – if you aren’t careful you can get attached to mystical stuff and the illusory self will identify with it and then you are right back where you started.

Being awakened just means seeing reality for what it is, understanding mind and the true nature of things. You still keep whatever physical form you have with all it’s limitations, you still have the same brain and the odd quirks and traits that go with it. The only thing that’s really changed is you know yourself and can see things as they really are, and this creates a feeling of being completely at peace with yourself and everything around you.



Who Are You? ii

There is something important Christianity has tried to suppress over the years, and it has been done very effectively by putting Jesus on a pedestal and making him out to be a higher being than us. This disinformation was created by priestly classes who enjoy the special privilege that religion brings to them and so it is in their interests that people never know the truth of who they are.

Jesus was deliberately elevated to the position of an omnipresent God outside ourselves. He was made into an idol, he was worshipped and once again an altar was created and so was the bizarre idea we need the blood of Jesus to go to heaven, that we are hopeless sinners who constantly need to ask forgiveness for our sins. It’s a load of nonsense. It is a way of programming our thinking to trap us into never knowing our true selves. It is an insanity – it doesn’t free our minds.

The upper classes they don’t like the idea of us all walking around realizing that we are Jesus equal, that we are the Buddha – that we can all do the same things these people did and more. Oh no that won’t do at all, they can’t have people walking around like that. They can’t have equality, it would be a disaster for the establishment and the wonky system they have created. So anyone in the past that realized the truth, like Jesus himself did, usually came to a sticky end, and the information was suppressed and demonized as blasphemy. Nowadays in Western society people aren’t burnt at the stake anymore or tortured for knowing the truth; they tend to be ridiculed, isolated and portrayed as mad. Some fanatical Christians will even accuse awakened people of doing the work of the devil and scare their congregation into remaining trapped in a false reality.

Interestingly Jesus himself was accused of doing the works of the devil. (Mathew 12:24)

So how do you know the truth? You need to quieten the mind and know yourself.


When you meditate regularly, you begin to understand the nature of the mind. With practise, you eventually gain the insight that you are not your thoughts, that the stuff you identify with as being the self is an illusion. Once you understand this you start to wake up and see things as they really are.

For many this can be a frightening realization; depending on how many layers of conditioning there are and how important that conditioning is to their sense of identity. So for some people it is best to go slowly with meditation and work their way up gradually, get some guidance if need be from experienced meditators, go on a retreat so you have the support of other people around you – cause this is your mind and you’re the one who has to live in it. If a person has built complex mental structures and they identify with those as being who they are, if those structures come tumbling down it can send people mad, so go easy if you need to. People should go at a pace they feel comfortable with. Just walk the path one step at a time and you will get there in the end.

I started with 3 minutes meditation a day and struggled to focus at first, my mind would be all over the place. I used an app on my phone to time my meditation and tell me when it was time to stop. I just kept doing it every day, and that is what is important. Regular daily practise. I gradually worked my way up by adding an extra minute each week. Now I can do nearly two hours of meditation a day and I actually look forward to doing it; but when I first started I didn’t really like it very much.

Some folks are so busy they don’t have time to do that much meditation. That’s OK. I think for them they should work their way up to roughly 15 minutes of sitting meditation a day and once this has become a regular part of their daily routine, they should try to watch themselves as they go about their daily life, do some self observation in the midst of activity; this will help them gain insight into how their mind works. You can meditate at any time really, whatever activity you’re doing can become a meditation.

This is easier to do at first if you set a timer to go off at random moments of the day, and when that alarm goes off, spend five minutes or so being mindful of whatever it is you are doing. Sometimes it helps to look at your hands and just feel the sensations in them, this can help bring you into the present moment, you can be aware of any part of the body or all of it at once, feel the different sensations, the feet on the ground, the feeling of walking, the feeling of being sat in a chair, the feeling of the cup in your hand, the breeze on your face. Is there any tension? What is causing the tension? Can you let go of the tension? This can be a meditation.

If your head is racing with many thoughts and chatting incessantly to itself, just watch it, watch what you’re thinking about without becoming attached or emotional, just watch. See if you can notice any tension or agitation in your body and how it correlates to what you are thinking about. Can you relax the tension you feel and does this in turn effect your thoughts and vice versa. Ask yourself at random moments in the day: Where am I? Focus on your surroundings, be present in the moment. This is also a meditation.

If you manage to get to the stage where you can just watch your thoughts and you are able to do some self observation, ask yourself who is the one doing the observing? How can you be thinking and watching your thoughts at the same time? Where is the presence of mind? Is the presence with the one watching, or the one doing the thinking?

Can you still be consious even when you’re not thinking?

Can you be aware of what is going on around you without thinking?

If you are conscious and aware of your surroundings when you are not thinking – Who are you?

The idea is to awaken,  and you do this by realizing the fake self we all create in our heads, the conditioning/programming that we identify with and think is us, isn’t actually who we are.


The Spasm from Hell

Woke up with the spasm from Hell. I think it may have been the most painful spasm I’ve had yet. I could not get rid of it, even two baclofen tabs wasn’t enough. I tried to find relief, but nothing worked, it lasted for hours. My body is all twisted & contorted today & walking anywhere is a mission. Trying to feed the fish took an intense level of coordinated concentration, trying not to trip over my left foot which is completely numb & I can’t tell when it is making contact with the ground. Gave up trying to get dressed, & just went back to bed. I feel weak, drained & just spent the day in bed drifting in & out of sleep & reading stuff on the internet; not done much musically this week, haven’t felt well enough to do it; trying not to feel depressed & useless, but sometimes I haven’t the will or the energy to stop those feelings.


I use WiFi just like most folk do, but I have discovered something disturbing about it, something which is covered up by the industry & governments of the world. There is no published document anywhere which states what a safe level of microwaves are for a child, the consensus is there is no safe limit for a child, & children shouldn’t be using WiFi at all. If you have kids, you should turn off your router & don’t let them use WiFi enabled devices. As addictive as WiFi is it isn’t safe for kids.

You should also avoid these smart meters, not only can they be used to spy on you, but they will create a thick soup of microwaves in your home & will over time make you & your children Ill.

The Tetra frequency used by the police & emergency services, is a pulse microwave frequency which can cause great harm. It is a worldwide experiment being conducted by the CIA, no Western government is allowed by the US to admit there are dangers associated with the tetra frequency. It can cause cancer, neurological harm & one of the symptoms that some folk get from being overexposed to tetra microwaves is increased aggression.

Over exposure can also cause a feeling of debilitating weakness & cancer, it can happen gradually or suddenly. Depending on the pulse, microwaves can effect people in different ways.

The military have been testing microwave weapons since the 60’s.

This isn’t some mad conspiracy theory, microwaves are not safe. They have never been safe, your microwave oven isn’t safe, almost all microwave ovens leak radiation. The dangers of microwaves are kept quiet to protect the industry from losing profits & to avoid the huge costs in court cases. The government will always deny that there are dangers associated with Wifi, because they are protecting corporate interests.

The smart technology we are all hooked on & love is softly killing us.


Another corporation to boycott till they do the right thing.

I am disturbed to hear about Kodaikanal mercury poisoning. I am tired of the evil in the world. They don’t have to be bad people, they have a choice, even if you’ve messed up you can still do the right thing.

I cannot with conscience continue to use Unilevers products, knowing what they have done. It is our money the customer, consumer, that supports them, & we don’t have to buy their products.

Profitable Incarceration

The privatisation of prison is one of the most evil acts of the British & American governments. These contracts state that the prisons must be at 90 – 95% capacity at all times. Judges get bribed to increase prison sentences, (Google the kid’s for cash scandal.)

The private companies who run prisons make a 500% profit, putting humans in cages & depriving them of their rights whilst forcing them to work in sweatshop conditions for £2 an hour has become a lucrative business. Not just for the corporations running the prisons, but the companies who can exploit prisoners for cheap Labour. It has become so lucrative even the big banks have taken notice & are investing in the private prison industry.

It is disgusting & evil. We in the West are despicable allowing this to happen. We the so called golden standard of civilization, Britain & America, we imprison more of our population than anywhere else in the world for non-violent harmless crimes. Often prisoners are kept in crap conditions, made to suffer hardships, just so these corporations can cut costs & make more of a profit.

These corporations, banks & our governments are disgusting twisted sick human beings.

This is the real reason cannabis isn’t legalized in Britain. It helps the government meet the obligations in their contract with private corporations to always ensure the prisons are filled to 90 – 95% capacity. I can imagine it won’t be long till people are imprisoned again for not being able to afford to pay their debts & for sleeping rough.

This is what the world is becoming. A dark evil soulless place where the love of money is the dominant religion & the fruits of that religion are exploitation, suffering, slavery, pollution, poverty, inequality, death & eventually extinction.

My view is prisons shouldn’t be privatized, this is one area the state shouldn’t shirk it’s responsibility, & prisons should treat prisoners well, why? Because by treating people with love, trust & respect, you are showing them why being like this makes society a better place. Cruelly punishing people, treating them like scum, forcing them to experience brutality & depravation, this just reinforces criminal behaviour & achieves nothing.

Britain & America are two of the most evil places to live in the world. How they criticize other nations for human rights abuses when they are some of the worst offenders is hypocrisy.

Just saying…

I will never feel proud of my country or love it, when there is evil like this going on. I’m not a capitalist & I’m not a communist, I am an environmental humanist. I am sick of how evil the world is. Enough is enough…

Britain & America should be ashamed of themselves, incarcerating people for profit is so low I can’t find an adequate word to describe how petulantly evil it is.

Will the mainstream media report on this? Where are the real journalists? It seems journalism has become nothing more than a mouthpiece for Corporate & Government sponsors. A spinning propaganda machine designed to keep the public thinking a certain way.

Britain, America, the EU – you want us to feel patriotic, then Danm well give us something to feel patriotic about. Something altruistic, something that does good, that makes the world a better more loving kinder place to live. Not this out of control corporate fascist evil that leaves behind it a trail of toxic suffering.

Exploitation of the world for profit. That isn’t what I believe in man. I want no part in this disgusting evil.